I live with my grandparents and we moved back into my mom and aunt’s childhood home. My aunt lives somewhere in the same town. The dream consists of me trying to talk to my aunt and but my grandparents are trying to keep me away from her because she’s “crazy”. (she struggles with addiction and schizophrenia in real life) The weirdest part was that her paintings looked like normal, beautiful paintings to me but to my grandparents they were odd and demonic. The childhood house also plays a part, I know my grandfather was abusive towards my mother and my aunt. He takes me into this room called the “O Room” and tells me about how he thought he was doing what was right when he hit them. There was a picture of his dad on the wall and he looks at it and sends me out of the room. I remember feeling scared he would hit me.
This dream is rich with symbols and emotions, reflecting deep-seated familial dynamics, personal fears, and the impact of mental health issues within your family environment. Here’s a detailed interpretation of the various elements present in your dream.
Attempt to Communicate with Your Aunt: Your endeavor to reach out to your aunt suggests a longing for connection and understanding, especially in the face of her struggles. It may also symbolize a desire to reclaim or understand aspects of family history that are often swept under the rug due to stigma surrounding her situation. Your aunt represents a part of your family that may be stigmatized and seen as “other,” while you seem to intuitively recognize her humanity and the beauty in her artistic expression.
Grandparents as Barriers: The role your grandparents play in preventing you from talking to your aunt underscores the conflict between loyalty to family and empathy for those who are suffering. Their label of your aunt as "crazy" reflects societal tendencies to dismiss or alienate individuals facing mental health troubles. It may also point to your own internal struggle about where your loyalties lie—between traditional family values upheld by your grandparents and the more compassionate viewpoint you seem to have towards your aunt.
The Beautiful Paintings + Demonic Perception: The contrast between how you perceive your aunt’s art and how your grandparents view it is significant. It suggests a dichotomy between mental health perceptions and societal judgments. To you, her paintings are normal and beautiful, symbolizing creative expression and perhaps a deeper understanding of emotional complexity. In contrast, your grandparents’ perception of them as odd or demonic could represent how societal disgrace can distort the views of mental illness, showing a lack of compassion and misunderstanding of those who struggle.
The Childhood Home and the O Room: Returning to a childhood home often signifies a journey into your past, embracing memories and experiences that shape who you are currently. The 'O Room' symbolizes trauma and secrecy. The abusive history hinted at with your grandfather's behavior may illustrate unresolved fears regarding familial violence and control. His comments about believing he was “doing what was right” reflect a common rationalization employed by abusers, demonstrating the complexity of familial bonds, guilt, and the ingrained patterns of behavior that can perpetuate cycles of abuse.
Fear of Abuse: The apprehension about possibly experiencing physical harm echoes your subconscious worries about the generational patterns of abuse and violence. This fear is deeply rooted and signifies a fear of not being able to protect yourself from the same traumas that may have affected your relatives.
Overall, the dream reflects an intricate interplay of love, loyalty, fear, and the quest for understanding within a complex familial landscape. It reveals your awareness of the nuances in mental health and highlights the importance of compassion towards those who are marginalized. In examining these themes, you may find a deeper understanding of your own feelings regarding family loyalty, mental illness, and the legacy of generational trauma. It could be beneficial to reflect on what aspects of your family history you wish to break free from, as well as how you can embrace empathy as a guiding principle when dealing with family challenges.